Ms. Kitty, A shocking Realization

Last updated 5/26/02

Halfway turned she stepped into this vision, causing his eyes to open wide as she spoke, "Does this mean you give up?" The cat's mind could not comprehend how this could have happened; she looked to have only a bloody lip where she should be without a head. Everything came to a grinding halt inside him as his body fell forward onto the floor. Ki'Lah just looked down at him and whipped the blood from her mouth, "What's wrong with him?"

She looked over him and accessing the computer panel she chanced the combat trainer to a medical training program. Picking up a levitator she placed it on him and used it to lift him up effortlessly. Ki'Lah loved these little toys, this one generates a zero gravity field around what ever it is placed on which makes anything even someone as heavy as Barong easy to move. Walking him over to one of the medical beds she set him on it then went to her computer to study the read-outs that the suit picked up from him during the fight.

Even from the readouts she could think of no reason why he should have passed out or even of reacted like he did. 'He did hit me kind of hard, but that couldn’t be it. She went over the readout at least a half dozen ties and each time she failed to see a cause for it. It was not until after he kicked her that his mental patterns and heart rate changed drastically. "What happened?" she asked slamming the readouts of the table. Looking over at him she could tell that he was just sleeping and already he was noticeably more relaxed, but he was not completely at ease.

Moving over to him she tried to help him relax by brushing the hairs in his mane, but instead of getting comfortable he seemed to grimace. 'He seems to be having a nightmare.' Thinking carefully of what to do she brushed her finger across his ear where a small golden earring. She had made this for him a long times ago, it was one of her protectors that was attuned specifically to him. Releasing the clasp on the back she removed it from his ear and placed a hand on his forehead. Concentrating she pressed her mind to his to see his thoughts, concern and strangely worry was making her curious. It was unsettling to see him like this though she did not know why. In his mind she saw blackness at first, then slowly several images came into focus.

"Oh no!" She gasped in surprise as she witnessed Barong standing amid several other soldiers. The soldiers were cats like him, but rebels, a collection of soldiers that believed that the King should be replaced. Barong was surrounded by several of them and being so close things have moved to hand-to-hand combat. He fought hard, but it was obvious that he was holding back. And then it happened, she watched as he used the same move on one of the soldiers as he used on her. However with a more disastrous result. With a quick kick she watched as the head was separated from his shoulders.

Horrified she watched as the soldiers' body changed to her. Before him now lay her body and across the room lay her head. He watched in mortifies silence as over and over he saw her die before him. Off to the side she heard her voice coming from the dismembered head, "Does this mean you give up?" Ki'Lah had to admit that even she was scared hearing such a thing, but it still confused her as to why was he taking this so hard.

Turning back to him she watched as he kneeled before her and cradled her corpse close to him, "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to, I'm sorry…" And then to her amazement he began to cry, but just a few tears. Fast and furious they came down his face and ran onto the dead body.

'Why is he acting this way? I thought he hated me?' Ki'Lah could not help but wonder about his actions as every time before when they had talked he always spoke down to her or he was angry. 'No that's not right…' she stopped to think a moment a moment about their first meeting and while he barely said much to her. But when he did speak it was not with his normal anger or frustration. Focusing her thoughts she pried deeper into his mind, "Why? Why are you mad at me and why are you acting like this?" Her mind began to throb with pain as she forced herself deeper into his thoughts.

"I'm sorry, please don't leave me…" She suddenly stopped as she heard his voice, it sounded weak and timid, which was a stark contrast to his bold, commanding voice.

"What do you think of me to make you act this way?" Entering his mind further she could now see through his eyes, she could see the kick impacting on her body and then she could feel him cradling the lifeless body to him. Inside his mind like this she began to see a number of images flying past her, most of which were of her.

In one she was wearing her training suit, "She looks good in that… though she looks good in nearly everything." The comment caused her to gasp and she recognized his voice, but before she could respond she saw another image of her, this time walking away from him. She recognized this as when he was waiting for Roy and Marie to return. "If only she had a tail…" Ki'Lah blushed at the thoughts going through his mind and she could see in his mental image of her that he was imagining what she would look like with a tail like his or Marie's

Many more scenes played by her and of just about every one he would make a comment about her looks or wishing she was one of his own kind. "But I thought Knights of King were bred to be void of these kind of thoughts and emotions?" Suddenly realization came to her. "He's starting to like me but he can't…." Reaching through his mind she found a number of things, or rules that he lived by. Things were ingrained in him as he grew from a child, things that he believes so strongly in it seems impossible for him to go against. One of those was that a Knight had to be of pure bloodline and only marry those of pure blood as well. That was why he was to marry Marie, because she was like him and being of pure blood. However since meeting Ki'Lah he has been hit with a number of emotions that he's never dealt with before.

"Does he like me?" She looked about incredulously at the mounting evidence surrounding her. It was obvious that he thought a lot about her, but now that she knew this what would she do or say? "If I come out and say I did this he will never trust me again." Once before when she had given him a mind scan he had made her promise to never do that again, which she has now done. However she was hoping to help him this time so she had forgot about her earlier promise. "He'll think I betrayed him." Ki'Lah was faced with a very daunting task, how to help him without letting him know she had done this, and then once he came out of this could she ever look at him the same?

Looking back at him holding her lifeless body he watched as he cried over it obviously upset over loosing her though he had never told her how he felt. "If he hates me forever I can at least know he'll make it through this." In all of her thousands of years she had devoted it primarily to her experiments and tests and never had she really even looked at a psychology book. Her parents had told her with her mental abilities she would make a great therapist if she only would study it more, but that seemed so boring. Now however she wished that she had paid more attention. "How am I to get him to accept that he didn't hurt me when he feels so strongly that he killed me?"

Looking up into the blackness around her she sighed, "Well I guess here goes nothing." She walked up close to him pushing away a strange feeling inside her. "Barong."

His eyes snapped up to her, to which they immediately widened in fear. "No! You’re a ghost! I'm sorry, I shouldn't have lost my temper. If you wish you may kill me now."

"No I am not here to kill you but to help you." Tears began to sting her eyes as she began feeling the level of pain and loss that he felt.

"Why help me, I've killed you… I deserve death."

Touching his shoulder she spoke to him softly, "Barong you did not kill me, this is a dream and nightmare."

"No! That kick should have killed you!"

Thinking quickly she tried to think of a way to tell him it did not hurt while not giving away her own secret, but that seemed to be becoming harder and harder to do. "I am not built that… weak that I could not survive a simple kick."

"That was not a simple kick… I've killed others before using less power than that… How could you not be dead?"

"Please understand that you know little about me… I am not… I am different enough that it would take something much stronger than that to really hurt me." Confusion entered his mind and she could sense it easily. "I am not just what I appear to be… I'm…" She choked back on something and realized that she had tears as well. 'Am I feeling these things from him or from me?' Indeed she was crying now though for what she was unsure, was it because she wanted to tell him the truth about her but couldn’t or was it that she was just feeling his emotions and they were overcoming her?

"What are you then?"

"I am not supposed to tell anyone…"

"Then show me…" He had moved closer to her, now just standing within arms reach. And though she was glad that he seemed to have accepted that she was not dead this was not what she wanted to do. "Please… I… I don’t know what I'd do if I lost you…"

Her eyes widened and she looked up at him carefully. "I know you're in my mind now… I can feel it… It's, you're calming to me."

"How could you know that?"

"I have felt you in my mind before." Now was her turn to be surprised and confused, he knows she's here and he's not mad? "How long have you been here?"

"Long enough to see that you're scared of loosing me… why?"

His eyes clouded over with grief, "I'm not supposed to show emotion, or disobey orders. But since meeting you I have had doubts, and with Roy suddenly appearing it has torn my world apart." At the sound of the human's name she looked at him surprised, mainly because he used the human's name. "Since I was a boy I was taught to never cry or show my emotions. As a candidate for being a knight I was taken from my family at a young age and taught the harsh realities of life in service." He laughed and she thought it seemed wholly out of place. "It wasn't until I was betrothed to Marie and placed on this ship that I had my first encounters with other beings different than me."

"I know, you spent months telling us how superior you were."

"But that's just it, I can't change that."

"Why not?"

"I am a knight of the King and as such I can only take as my wife one whom is of pure blood." Ki'Lah was at a loss as to how this fit in to everything. He placed a hand on her cheek and caressed it gently, "I can only marry someone like me…" Realization dawned on her that he was saying hat he cared deeply for her, but he could not have her or even tell her that he cared for her. "To marry outside my race would forfeit everything I am, everything I have done."

Tears began burning her eyes and blurring her vision as his hand, gentle and kind remained against her skin seemingly burning her skin with its heat. "Why? You don't even know me."

"I know enough." He began to tear up himself, "I can only tell you this here in my mind and hope that it is you I am talking to and not some damned illusion of my mind. To admit this openly would go against my King." He leaned down and gave her a quick kiss before everything went black for her again.

She had the sensation of falling, but from where to where she did not know as her senses were completely fouled up and of no use at this moment. She could have been standing or sitting or even somewhere in between, but she did not care. Right now all that she cared about was what he had said, and done. He had all but admitted he loved her, and had kissed her. It had felt so good, but it was not real, it was only a mental projection of his emotions and after this he would remain quiet about his feelings. For a brief moment she was happy, but now she was feeling worse than before. She had lost something that she never knew she had or wanted. And to go after what she wanted would destroy everything that he was, which was something she could not do.

In the recesses of her mind she had enjoyed all the verbal attacks and fights that they had and she even liked him on some level, but she was not sure if she felt the same for him. And even if she did, could she destroy what he was just to get what she thought she felt for him? Slowly her senses of sight and sound returned and she found herself on the floor beside his bed. Apparently she had fallen over and now she was just lying on the floor beside it. This place served as good as any for the outpouring for her emotions and she began to cry, not from feeling his emotions anymore, but hers.

Hours had passed since Ki'Lah lost consciousness, but even as she stayed on the floor Barong stayed on the bed, still asleep, but no longer tormented at seeing her death. He knew that she lived, and that she was stronger than he had ever thought. What she was he did not know, nor did he care beyond the thought that she was not one of his people. And that one simple fact made it impossible for him to be more than a friend to her. No matter what he felt or truly wanted. There were others though that were not as worried about their relationship. But they were not completely at ease of the future.

Roy and Marie knew how they felt for each other and had expressed that several times, occasionally out of a need to calm their own fears more so than just telling the other that they were loved. The human Roy though after spending several hours in the medical lab had though about getting up and exploring the ship, but Marie still was sleeping. And though he wanted to move he did not want to disturb her. In his mind he could make out the basic shape of the ship and from his new memories he could tell where he was inside it, and to a lesser degree he knew his way around. But he still wanted to make the memories his own, and the best way seemed to be a guided tour, with her of coarse being the tour guide.

For now he just let her sleep and he at first could not understand why would she be so tired, 'Unless she's too used to her cat naps from before,' he mused while thinking of all the naps he caught her taking while in her cat form. He did not notice through that she was awake and just trying to decide on what to do first. When she felt him holding her closer she just enjoyed it while it would last but sooner or later they would have to get moving. Which also meant having to go back into space, and eventually going back home. However, on the way she knew that they were going to face those that had forced them to land here. It was inevitable that they would. Whoever would shoot at this ship had little regard for her fathers' empire and the treaties he had with other planets. This rogue band they had no name for, and not even an idea of what they looked like. However it was obvious that they were intent on capture and not destruction.

Pard their last pilot had made a valiant attempt to get them to safety before he was wounded. One of the attackers sent a robot to kill the pilot. They had almost succeeded but Barong was able to make it to him in time to save him, but only for a little while. Pard's wounds could not be healed completely and instead of seeking treatment he continued to fly them to safety, and then and only then would he let go of the controls. But by then it was too late, and all they could do for him was put him in stasis and hope to find a replacement. That replacement was Roy and she feared that they might try to attack the pilot directly again, and Roy, though she loved him and trusted him, she knew he was no where near the fighter that Pard was.

While thinking of the future her ears suddenly heard the sound of footsteps. They sounded like they were headed to the medical lab, but she could not place them right off. 'It could be Ki'Lah or Barong trying to be quiet, but the steps are lighter than his and heavier than hers.' Quickly she tried to place them, but after being away from everyone on board for so long, she had nearly forgotten who it could be. But she knew it was not someone to worry about. At least she thought that until the door opened.

"Ki'Lah? Are you in here?"

Sighing, Marie sat up disturbing the peace she was just in. "She hasn’t returned yet."

Roy look to the door to see who the intruder was, obviously Marie knew who it was and he took a moment to look at her and try to remember her name. "Marie, there you are, we've been worried…" The woman moved closer upon hearing Marie's voice and as she came closer he could see that she was shorter than the others, but not by much. She looked to be about five-foot and jet-black hair. He could not see her eyes as she wore dark glasses even though the lights were dimmed in the lab. The most interesting feature though had to be the bat-like wings that had been wrapped around her like a cape. They seemed to meet up in the front where they seemed to cross each other; at least they did until they fluttered open as she moved to give Marie a hug he supposed. She had stopped talking as has looking directly at him. Her skin was very dark, like a deep tan though her wings were blacker than any night he had ever seen. She was wearing black boots, or at least he supposed they were boots that came up to her knees, and her shorts and top appeared to be made of the same type of material that the boots were.

Marie looked between the girl and Roy, as they seemed to be examining each other just a little too closely which caused her to grind her teeth a little. "It's good to see you again Tla'meha," she said forcefully.

"Huh, oh yea. It's been a while. Since you left to go see the human's it's been rather quiet around here, though looking at him I can see why you were, detained." She smirked while looking at him though she spoke to Marie. "Do you think I could try him too? He looks rather interesting."

"What!" She nearly shrieked.

"Oh don't give me that Marie, he's cute you should be happy you've finally got some, though I thought you were into…"

Roy noticed as Marie began to blush furiously and at the same time look angry. To hopefully help things he opened his mouth in an effort to quell her anger, he did not even realize how easily their language came from him, "I'm sorry Tla'meha, but I don't think I could stand being without Marie."

Both girls looked at him surprised more of the fact that he spoke their language almost perfectly. "Damn Marie, not only is he cute but polite too." She gave the cat woman a conspiratorial wink, "Ok Marie you've got him for a bit longer, but it you loose interest in him…"

"You're hopeless," Marie said shaking her head trying to hold back a smile as well as trying to hide the strong blush from what he said.

The girl just shrugged her shoulders and left, but when she reached the door, she turned around asking, "By the way when do we launch? I know he's got other ideas, but we need to get going." With a wink she left before either of them could respond.

Marie turned to him and noticed that he was blushing now as well. "Don’t tell me she was actually able to read your mind?" He just blushed harder causing her to laugh. Her laugh only lasted a moment though before he pulled her close kissing her on the lips passionately.

"I thought so!" A voice crowed from the door causing them both to jump and look back at the door where Tla'meha stood.

"We, she, um… I mean…" Roy tried his best, but simply shrugged his shoulders. "Fine, you caught us. Are you just going to stand there watching us?" Marie was treated to a rare site as he caused Tla'meha to blush, the girl simply turned and was about to leave when Roy added, "can you lock the door too?" With Marie's good hearing she could hear Tla'meha gasp then chuckle quietly before running out the door.

"And what was all that about?" Marie asked in mock protest. He just chuckled softly running his fingers through her silver hair before pulling her into a kiss.

Stopping it momentarily he told her softly, "Sorry, I just wanted to make sure you never had to worry."

"Well in that case…" she pulled away from him though her body did it very reluctantly, "…we need to move to a more private location."

"And where is that?"

"Well we have your room, or…" She looked at him feigning shyness.

"We'll go to my room first, I guess I should at least see it once." He kissed her once more before they moved to their feet and out the door arm in arm. "I am confused about something…"

"Yes?"

"Pard said that she was from a dark planet, and hates being in the sun." She stopped at the mention of Pard and it took him a moment to realize she was not beside him. When he turned he saw that she seemed to be confused almost to the point of being scared. "Marie, what's wrong?"

"What, what do you mean he said?"

"Oh," he rubbed his chin trying to think of a way to explain it. "Well even he doesn’t know how it happened, but it's like he's in my mind… sort of like I remember everything he does including his personality."

"How? That's not possible, only his knowledge not his memories were to be transferred."

He just shrugged his shoulders, "We don't really understand either, but it's not a bad thing. He's been telling me about the crew and things that all of you have been through, so it's nice having him there."

She just looked at him skeptically and nodded, "If you say so, that must be how you picked up on our language so fast." He quirked an eyebrow at her, "Well you have been talking in our language much faster than any other species, and even now you speak it near fluently." His eyes shot open as he realized he had not been talking in English but in her language. "As… as for your question why do you say you're confused?"

Roy searched back through his mind for the question he had asked her a moment ago and he had nearly forgotten what he had asked. "Um, Tla'meha… looks like she's done a lot of tanning to have never been in the sun." Now it was her turn to look confused. "Most people on my world only look that way after sitting in the sun for hours."

"Oh she'd never do that!"

"Why not?"

"On her world it is always dark, though there is a definite difference between day and night. Her day's are much like nights on Earth, with their nights being much darker."

"So how'd she get so tan?"

"Tan? Oh you mean her skin, well like on your world not every one has the same skin color, and for people like her they are dark colored themselves to blend in to the darkness. That way when their enemies come to close they can hide in shadows and strike. She's been with us for some time so much of her coloring has faded thanks to the light on board. But those glasses she wears are to protect her eyes from the light."

"So she never takes them off?"

"No, it might cause her to go blind, these lights are much too bright for her. You know, come to think of it, I've never even seen her eyes." The two laughed over that and continued on the tour. "Pard possibly doesn’t know much about her, but don’t let her fool you, she's not what she seems." He turned to her and was just about to ask why when she told him, "I'm glad she's on our side, she's what was called a shadow."

"A Shadow? What do you mean everyone has a shadow?"

"Not like her." Marie turned gravely serious for a moment, "When we first met her she was sent to kill me, and she almost succeeded if it hadn’t been for Barong. She nearly killed him three times and only his thick hide saved him."

"Why is she here if she tried to kill you and how could she get so close? He's pretty big and looks to easily be able to beat her."

"Barong is big and strong, but just that doesn't mean he'll win. She's smaller, faster and more precise than him." He still did not seem to be getting it. "In a fist to fist fight Barong might win, but she hides in the shadows, and is almost invisible to your eyes while there. She moves close and before you know what has happened she has killed you." Moving her eyes to the ceiling she recounted an old memory. "Tla'meha is the best shadow, and the list of those that she's killed would take too long to even tell you a portion of them, but she's not in that business anymore."

"But what about heat sensors or something, I bet they could spot her."

"No, her wings, when surrounding her, block out nearly every bit of heat her body radiates, and the only heat that shows up on any monitors shows up right as she reached out to kill." Marie shivered as the thought of how many Tla'meha had to have killed to become the best at it.

Roy nodded nervously as he recalled her in his mind. She seemed to be a kid almost with the way she acted back there, but to think that she had nearly killed Barong three times was impressive. It seemed strange though that anyone could come close enough to kill him. His thoughts were interrupted by a voice in his head, "As they say on your world Roy, size doesn't matter. She's faster than he is; I've seen how she has put a sword to Barong's throat several times in simulations. Trust me."

"Ok, I'll trust you." Roy said both to the voice and to Marie.